I’ve posted an article directly from my new book  for you.

Dealing with Disappointment can be found in Chapter 7 : “Not So Great Expectations”of “Half a Glass: The Realist’s Guide“.

Related posts:

1. Dealing with Disappointment
2. Failure Friday: Safety Glass
3. Raters of the Last Film

I’ve added a new article on distractions. Are you doing work to avoid doing work?

Click here to read more.

Related posts:

1. The Blame Game Article is available
2. BP = Bad Planning
3. The Stupid Factor

Wanted to share this great post from LifeHacker:

We are all the best person we know and, in general, tend to think we’re pretty unbiased as well. Illusory superiority can help us keep a healthy, optimistic attitude, but it can also prevent us from doing something great.

Recently Derek Sivers, founder and former president of CDBaby, posted about the benefits of assuming you’re below average. The suggestion is this: if you don’t assume you’re all that great you’ll be much more open to learning new things, asking more questions, and approaching situations with the sort of humility that leads to considering a good idea you may have otherwise thought to be stupid.

Illusory superiority basically comes down to a bias about yourself that causes you to think you’re better than you are in a certain situation. It’s a brand of positive thinking that can cause you trouble. (As we’ve already seen, positive thinking can cause unnecessary stress.) This trouble is called the Dunning-Kruger effect, which occurs when a person overrates their ability and ends up making poor decisions as a result.

The Dunning-Kruger effect generally refers to incompetent people who, because of their lack of knowledge, are also incapable of realizing their mistakes due to a lack of metacognitive ability—the ability to know about knowing—but you don’t have to be incompetent to overestimate your greatness. Many times we can try to psych ourselves up and tell ourselves how great we are in order to make ourselves feel better. This may have a positive emotional effect but isn’t necessarily the right approach. Next time you have to assess your ability in a particular area, consider that you might not be as good as you think you are. Instead, give yourself the opportunity to listen and be open to new ideas. You may just learn something you’d have otherwise missed.

Send an email to Adam Dachis, the author of this post, at adachis@lifehacker.com.

Related posts:

1. Self-esteem: Teens feel great about themselves — but are they headed for a fall? – chicagotribune.com
2. Not-so Great Expectations!
3. Media Monday: Putting Depression into Great Depression

One problem with rumors is what people don’t know, they will make up. Since people naturally have a tendency to think negative thoughts, they are going to make the rumor much worse than the truth.

If something behind the scenes, like budget talks or layoffs, is going on they get blown out of proportion. If anyone merely speculates on something, it can be spread around like a virus, mutating into something out of control, regardless of the facts. Often a rumor that we hear is more interesting than the truth we know.

The longer a rumor lasts, the more damage it does. The longer you allow it to exist, the worse it will get. Morale will get down. People will blow things out of proportion, make stuff up, extrapolate some obscure unimportant fact into a monster that is totally untrue. They end up scaring themselves and other people.

Try avoiding these phrases:

1. “Don’t tell anyone I told you.” That translates into “Hit the broadcast button. We’re telling everyone!”
2. “This is just between us.” Because as soon as they walk away, they’ll tell someone else “this is just between us.”
3. “Can you keep a secret?” The person asking that question obviously can’t, since the next thing they will say is a secret they promised someone else they would keep.

 Those three phrases, when you hear them, whatever comes out of their mouths, you know it will be juicy gossip, you know it will be interesting and you know it will be something you just have to tell someone else.

Avoid closed doors, especially when you know rumors are lurking about. If you know people are talking, closed-door meetings just end up breeding more rumors. When people feel excluded from information, it makes them suspicious. Their natural negative thinking kicks in and they’ll assume bad things. Then they tell other people their suspicions, as often as possible. By holding closed-door meetings, you are telling the excluded there is something secretive (a.k.a. Bad!) going on and they’ll assume it’s about them. That’s human nature.

Try and have face-to-face conversations where questions can be asked and answered. When you can take the time to talk about what’s happening, instead of piece-mealing answers, much of the anxiety can be set aside. Don’t hide behind emails or memos, as they can be misinterpreted without an opportunity for clarification. People always read emails with a negative slant. Misinterpretations of a simple message can set back the entire process.

Rumors can get wildly out of control if we allow them to go unchecked. Knowing whom you can go to in order to get the skinny can be life saving. Don’t spend your time rumor-mongering. Instead, identify reliable sources. It also verifies the wannabes who never have the right stuff.

Or so I’ve heard…

Related posts:

1. Rumor Has It…
2. I Heard it Through the Grapevine
3. Responding to Search Terms: Cover your face!!

Feel free to read the latest article added to the archives:

The Blame Game

Related posts:

1. Generation Y and Loyalty Article Now Available
2. Who’s the boss? And are they any good?
3. Media Monday: Weather or not

Self-esteem: Teens feel great about themselves — but are they headed for a fall? – chicagotribune.com.

This interesting article covers two topics I speak on in one tidy post. The fact that constructive, necessary Negative Thinking isn’t being taught to the younger generations.  This excerpt about how the reality of what “truths” we tell our children to make them feel better shows can blow up in their unexpected faces sums it up nicely.

The ultimate problem with inflated self-esteem, Twenge said, is that it can end with a painful reckoning. Alex Ortiz knows what that feels like.

As she grew up in Elmhurst, softball was her life. She had played since age 4, adoring the game and the bonds she formed with her teammates. Her e-mail address started with the handle “Softballgrl.”

She was good too — or so her coaches had always told her. But then she got to York, where claiming a place on the freshman team meant surviving the cuts that followed a three-day tryout.

She didn’t make it. Distraught, she gave up the game.

“I went from being told, ‘You’re good, you’re good,’ to getting told I’m not really good,” said Ortiz, 16, who will be a junior in the fall. “It kind of crushed me. It felt like (earlier coaches) had been lying to me.”

Others, though, say they embraced their reality checks. Rovi, the lackadaisical honor student, said she soon accepted the fairness of her C, realizing it was a better grade than her minimal effort deserved. It spurred her to work harder, she said, and she ended up graduating as an Illinois State Scholar.

Does this mean when our kids aren’t great at something we need to tell them they suck? Of course not. But by letting them know what they are good at and what they need to work on is immensely helpful. It instills pride from overcoming obstacles as well as give a nice dose of humility. Something sorely lacking in most people in general, nevermind our children.

Related posts:

1. Narcissists or Necessary?
2. Generation Smug?
3. Not-so Great Expectations!

I’ve just added an new article to the archives relating to Company Loyalty and the New Workforce. You can find it here!

Related posts:

1. The Blame Game Article is available
2. Generation Y: The What’s and How’s of the New Workforce
3. Loyalty to a fault. Your fault.

And the final chapter of Stephen’s journey to be an astronaut:

Related posts:

1. Stephen Colbert – Fallback Position – Astronaut Pt.1
2. Stephen Colbert – Fallback Position – Astronaut Pt.2
3. Fallback Friday – Stephen Colbert's Fallback Position – Astrophysicist

Here is part 2 of Stepen Colbert’s recent visit to Houston’s Johnson Space Center to train…just in case.

Related posts:

1. Stephen Colbert – Fallback Position – Astronaut Pt.1
2. Stephen Colbert – Fallback Position – Astronaut Pt.3
3. Stephen Colbert's Fallback Position: Air Force Thunderbirds

As seen here in the past, even wildly popular TV show host Stephen Colbert can see the necessity of planning for the worst and never assuming a sweet gig like his will always be there. Recently (unbeknownst to me!) Stephen came down to Houston’s Johnson Space Center to train…just in case.

Related posts:

1. Stephen Colbert – Fallback Position – Astronaut Pt.2
2. Stephen Colbert's Fallback Position: Air Force Thunderbirds
3. Stephen Colbert – Fallback Position – Astronaut Pt.3